Friday, November 04, 2011

How could I resist? HINT: I couldn't (part 1)

So you may remember that a couple years ago I did a four part review of the book Off World by Stephanie Vaughan (spoiler: it was awful). You may remember that I didn't like. At all. Also, I drank a lot. It was not a good book for my liver.

Anyway, I may have mentioned at the end of the review/drunken sobbing that there was a sequel and that I would read and review it if someone paid me to. Well, no one did, but my friend, who apparently loves watching me rage and/or get drunk, bought me a copy of that book. Since I did not give Stephanie Vaughan my money, I get to review it (or, more likely, bitterly snark about it).

The book is Off World 2: Sanctuary, and is less a sequel and more a second book in the series. And it's surprisingly not horrible. I know, I know, I'm shocked too. Don't get me wrong, it's not even close to being a great book, much less a good one, but it is light years better than the first one, mainly because the main characters are actually likable and Zombie Vaughan doesn't really attempt a plot, which, let's be honest, she is awful at.

So basically, this review is probably going to follow the format of the first, in which I take it chapter by chapter, not because it is a train wreck of epic proportions, but because I like to go in depth when I mock things. Also, since I have the book on my nook, I will be including the notes I wrote instead of any text messages. Oh, and if anyone is wondering why I refer to Stephanie Vaughan as Zombie Vaughan, it's because in the first book she foreshadowed a frankly ridiculous plot development that I said if she went through with she would be dead to me. She did and so she is still dead to me. Now, let's get started.

To recap the first book: there was an incomprehensible plot, heroes were horrible human beings, and there was a lot of gay sex. The end.

That's not enough? Fine. So the background you need for this book is that Caleb, formerly Our Dear Fucking Hero, went chasing after and meeting up with Sarhaan and his group of eugenically engineered soldiers, half of who are implausibly gay. Sarhaan and his merry band of soldiers zombie Vaughan doesn't bother giving names and/or personalities to, stole the ship Vigilante and fled Republic/an Earth (which may or may not be a planet wide government), where being homosexual (which in the context of the book is only men, as lesbians are never mentioned ever) is punishable by death. Sarhaan and the others were being framed for the murder of several prostitutes for reasons never made clear, and Caleb's dead fag hag, Daphne, was murdered as she investigated, prompting him to ditch earth for the failgenes soldiers.

Sarhaan and Caleb fuck a lot and fall in love, and frankly two people as horrible as them deserve each other. Along the way we meet D'abu, the only useful person in the entire book, and Alex, who solved the "plot" because he overheard a conversation when he worked as a prostitute at Earthly Pleasures, where he met Sarhaan and the implausibly named Xai Kuwicha, Sarhaan's second in command. This is their story (chun chun).

Artist Ally: Fluffy Muffinface

Or maybe I'll call it Fan Art Friday? I dunno. either way I'm thinking of making this a regular feature (if anything so I don't have a valid "can't think of anything to write" excuse not to post.) I'll post an artist, link you to thier website or deviant art site or whatever and then rant at length about why I chose them or why they're awesome...or nothing at all. I AM THE DECIDER. I'll also feature a peice that especially speaks to me. I invite my fellow author-ess's to run with this idea as well! I'll try to stick to a geeky theme, but I can't promise to remember that! So here goes!

My First Annual Artist Ally selection is inspired by the fact that my boyfriend and I are both binging on Star Trek episodes. (Probably more than the legal limit, but in my defense I'm watching the original series and the NextGen eps...he's watching Voyager and DS9. Clearly I'm consuming quality and he is snarfing down the sci-fi television equivalent of a Twinkie. Neither one of us will sink to the depths of Enterprise...despite the cloying call of all that is Bakula.)

This fantastic artist, (who's live journal is here, and whose deviant art page is here) goes by the name Fluffy Muffinface (or...Jemma). Also went through a marathon run of Star Trek tOS episodes, and this hysterical series of web-comics were her response to all that ridiculous-ness. Obviously you will have to have seen the referenced episode to truly appreciate these, but the whole damn series is streaming on the Netflix so what's your excuse now HMMM!?

-ahem- I'll post a few here, but you can see them all at this link! (Don't miss expanding each of the posts for more comics!) Please to Enjoy.